REAL PERSON ROUND-UP 029

Time for a heaping dose of real folk from Golden Age Marvel comics.

Adolf Hitler:

Kalph Belgri, dictator of Torpis, takes his own life when his invasion of neighbouring Molivia is thwarted by Electro. (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 005, 1940)

The Human Torch encounters Adolphe Hiccup, dictator of Slaveland, while foiling a plot to fool his sidekick Toro into aiding their war effort. He is seen colluding with his ally Benny Musclein, who is such a clear Mussolini stand-in that I feel a bit foolish even mentioning it.

Hiccup's aide Herr Medals, on the other hand, is quite vexing to me, as despite his physical appearance and love of regalia being clearly based on Hermann Goering, his name makes me think of Goebbels, which caused me to poison my search history a little more by looking up the Nazi high command yet again to make sure I had the right guy. (Human Torch v1 003, 1940)

Al Capone:

Mob boss Vince Garrone is the latest in a long line of crooks with Capone-like names. (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 017, 1941)

Fiorello La Guardia:

Marvel Comics was a very NYC-heavy operation even back when it was Timely Comics, and as a consequence of that we get far more Mayoral Action from them than other publishers. Here we see Mayor La Guardia showing a lot of moxie while dealing with a hostile Sub-Mariner, for example. (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 007, 1940)

Not even a year later, here's the Human Torch helping out a mysterious and unnamed non-La Guardia Mayor of NYC. Just who the heck is this guy? (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 016, 1941)

La Guardia is back by Marvel Mystery Comics v1 020, just in time to deal with an epidemic of arson and extortion aimed at the city.

Finally, a chunky little La Guardia thanks the Patriot for fending off the attempted takeover of the city by the fascist Yellowshirts. (Human Torch v1 004, 1941)

Orson Welles:

The Human Torch must deal with a Martian invasion, and that means referencing Orson Welles' War of the Worlds broadcast, here attributed to a "Lawson Bell." (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 003, 1940)

NOTES - SEPTEMBER 2026

The Looming Spectre of Death:

 

Death rides, menaces the Human Torch in a flooding tunnel, advances as a glacier and looks over Hitler's shoulder, all from the same busy issue: Human Torch v1 005b, 1941

The Looming Spectre of War:

Also from Human Torch v1 005b: the looming spectre of war, in the form of Mars, menaces the USA and rejoices in the flooding of Berlin.

SUPER-HERO FILE 005: THE HUMAN TORCH

(Marvel Comics 001, 1939)

The Human Torch! The first major (and first overall) Marvel super-hero, despite the fact that my disorganized ass is writing about him third!

The Human Torch is a synthetic man, aka an android (aka a synthezoid, which as far as I can tell means "cooler android" and won't come into use until the 60s anyway) and created by Professor "Not Yet Phineas" Horton. Later stories will add all kinds of influences on and collaborators with Horton (including our recent subject Doctor Nemesis), but in the beginning it was just him, toiling away over his blonde creation.

The Human Torch's origin is shaped by three major factors: first, that Horton's process was flawed in some strange way and as a result his android bursts into flame when exposed to oxygen. Secondly, there is the fact that Horton, despite the obvious scientific acumen and indeed genius on display in his creation, is seemingly devoid of any scientific curiosity outside of this. When confronted with the problem of a flaming android, Horton just throws his hands in the air and gives up without making any kind of real effort to mitigate the problem.

Finally, the Torch is hampered by the fact that humanity at large, including Horton, is motivated by fame and fortune. Everyone who meets him wants to exploit him in some way, unless they are afraid of him - this is presumably why Horton's first act upon creating him is to call in reporters rather than work on getting him to stop exploding.

Though Horton can't bring himself to work on a solution for the Torch's problem, he balks at destroying his creation and so opts to seal him inside of an airless steel cylinder and then bury that cylinder in cement.

Somehow, however, and perhaps relating to the fact that it was dropped into semi-solid cement from a decent height rather than laid down carefully and then covered up, the cylinder develops a crack through which enough air seeps in to set the Torch alight and cause him to burst his prison asunder. Everyone's worst fears seem to be confirmed, as the newly self-aware android charges through the city streets, setting men, hats and telephone poles alight. A curious thing happens, however, and perhaps this reflects yet another failing on the part of Horton: the Human Torch realizes that he is hurting people and doesn't want to. You should have talked to your artificial son, Professor, and then you might not have felt it necessary to seal him in concrete.

In attempting to control his own flame (see? once again the child outstrips the parent), the Torch dunks himself in a swimming pool that turns out to belong to a criminal named Sardo who immediately sees the profit potential in a flaming man. Side note: Sardo also has a swimming pool that doubles as a vacuum chamber. Is there any use for such a thing beyond "elaborate deathtrap?"

Sardo's reaction to the Torch falls under theme #3 of this origin: Human Greed. He uses his weird pool to transfer the android to a sealed container and then uses him to burn down a warehouse as part of a protection racket scheme. Just like Horton, however, Sardo fails to reckon with the fact that the Torch might have opinions of his own about such things, and meets his end in their subsequent confrontation. 

The Human Torch eventually figures out how to control his own flame thanks to Sardo's stockpile of liquid nitrogen tanks - the nitrogen snuff the flame only temporarily but having done so a couple of times the Torch gets the hang of how to do so at will. We almost get a heartwarming father/son reunion as Horton argues for the Torch to be released into his custody, but then he goes and ruins it all by immediately starting to scheme about how much money he is going to make off of his creation's back. This is the final straw as far as the Human Torch is concerned and he leaves via the most direct route: straight up.

(Per Marvel Mystery Comics v1 002 this sets Horton's house on fire and leads to his death, and the Torch isn't sad about it)

 

DIVINE ROUND-UP 035

Time to revise the Comparative Religion curriculum again because we found some new gods.

Adobi:

Just to what extent these Molemen worship the god Adobi is impossible to say. This particular Moleman hold him in high enough esteem to implore him to sanctify a forced political marriage, if that counts for anything much. I really wish we had a better angle on Adobi's front side so I could see the big gems in his chest and forehead better.

God Style: Idol (Lightning Comics v2 002, 1941)

Vango:

After escaping the lands of the Adobi-worshipping Molemen, Congo Jack encounters the worshippers of the multi-armed Vango. We don't learn too much about Vango himself, alas, as the bulk of the narrative is taken up with a religious schism between pro- and anti-human sacrifice Vango worshippers. He looks good!

God Style: Idol (Lightning Comics v2 004, 1941)

Fire:

The Fire-Men (aka the Fire-Cult) are a weird bunch to categorize. They are initially antagonists to the Human Torch, and give him a run for their money with their flame control powers while they hunt down and kill a former member. Then, however, they reveal that he was not merely an apostate but someone who was planning on using the cult's teachings to profit while causing great destruction, and that he had a partner who is still at large. The Torch is left with to choice but to team up with his former adversaries.

Though the Fire-Men presumably worship or at least pay fealty to the flame that they control, the real focus of the group is less religious than practical, as they work to contain the rampaging Flame Monsters of Tibet, giant green humanoids who emit flame from their pores. 

(the second traitor to the cult turns out to be a man named Culflam, who later passes on the Fire-Men's teachings to the Torch's enemy the Parrot)

God Style: Animist (Real?) (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 014, 1940)

Flamosa the Fire God:

God of the people of the volcanic Inferno Isle in the Pacific, who appear to have been manipulated into practicing human sacrifice by a group of Nazis in order to dispose of Allied scientists in the area. The Angel semi-accidentally blows up half the island and sets off the volcano, and the worship of Flamosa is abandoned.

God Style: Idol (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 023, 1941)

MINOR SUPER-HERO ROUND-UP 104

Here are some very minor Marvel Comics super-heroes, or at least super-hero adjacent comic book adventurers.

the Masked Raider:

The Masked Raider is actually Jim Gardley, a small-time rancher in the town of Cactusville (which has apparently been officially placed in California? the hell?) is run off his land and framed as a rustler by crooked business interests. Adopting his masked persona and acquiring a souped-up horse named Lightning, he strikes back at his persecutors and goes on to spread justice throughout the West.

Recently (well, seven years ago), Marvel Comics 1000 recontextualized the Masked Raider as being part of a chain of super-heroes who are empowered by an artifact known as the Eternity Mask, but that's all future stuff. As far as we are concerned, for the next 80-odd years worth of comics the Masked Raider is just a two-fisted cowboy. (Marvel Comics 001, 1939)

Ka-Zar:

Ka-Zar is in actuality David Rand, who was gradually orphaned after his family was stranded in the jungle when he was a toddler. First his mother dies of a fever, which, along with a bit of head trauma, causes his father to have a mental break and decide to settle down in the jungle rather than try to get back home. Some years later, the vile emerald hunter de Kraft invades this jungle life and kills David's father, leaving David to be brought up the rest of the way by the lion Zar and his mate. Ka-Zar = "Brother of Zar," which is a better origin than most jungle man nonsense names get. Ka-Zar's origin ends when he slays de Kraft, who has returned to get more delicious emeralds.

This particular Ka-Zar is of course doomed to obscurity thanks to the existence of the other Ka-Zar, who somehow continues to appear to this day. Marvel has no need of any more jungle heroes, let alone a surplus Ka-Zar. (Marvel Comics 001, 1939)

Ferret:

Though private detective characters are a dime a dozen in Golden Age comics, Ferret here is distinguished in a few ways: firstly by the fact of his cool name, secondly by dint of having a bit of the weaselly appearance of his namesake rather than being your typical comic book squarejaw, and finally because he is a bit of a go-to in more modern comic flashbacks when they want to add a bit of non-costumed 40s flair. (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 004, 1940)

Most importantly, as of Marvel Mystery Comics v1 005, Ferret has a real ferret named Nosey for a pet.

Terry Vance:

Terry Vance, aka the Schoolboy Sleuth, aka the Boy of a Hundred Hobbies is a science-minded youth, of the subtype that deals in actual science and not comic book super tech. Mostly, at least - he does occasionally stretch the bounds of what a remote controlled plane can do.

Vance splits his time between school, the Bike Club, his famed Hundred Hobbies and solving grisly murders that have the police flummoxed, and he does it all with the aid of a monkey named Dr Watson and a reporter pal named Deadline Dawson. 

If any of these characters is a ripe candidate for revival, it's Terry*, as a venerable old detective, an embittered old tech billionaire, a benevolent old tech billionaire... the possibilities are finite but vast! Heck, have him still be a teen, having gotten too close to the super-villainous side of crime and been blasted through time and/or space. (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 010, 1940)

*Ferret was killed off by Ed Brubaker, alas. 

MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 1004: THE GREEN HOOD GANG

(Lightning Comics v2 002, 1941)

The Green Hood Gang, who are unsurprisingly a gang who wear green hoods (and please note the rare and stylish nose cutouts on those numbers), make their debut by barging in and robbing the Raven after he himself had just gone to the trouble of holding up the guests of a party at the home of retired gangster Joe Russo.

From there, the Green Hoods embark on a crime spree so ambitious in scope that Police Chief Lash is compelled to set aside his personal crusade against the Raven and team up with him to hunt them down.

For most of this story I had assumed that the leader of the Green Hood Gang would turn out to be Joe Russo, coming out of retirement and starting out by robbing his own party guests, and I suspect that the writer of this comic was also of this opinion right up until they got to page eight out of ten, at which point the men under the hoods - previously very clearly regular American gangsters - are revealed to be Native South Americans. Further investigation by Lash and the Raven reveals that these men are dupes who have been promised that the funds they are stealing are to be put toward the construction of a temple in their homeland, but who are really working for a former bootlegger named Larue.

While I wouldn't call the Joe Russo version of this story very original or exciting, the Larue reveal is so out of left field that I am left baffled and bamboozled. If I can't trust a comic book writer 85 years ago, just who can I?

Categorized in: Colours (Green), Generica (Gangs), Objects (Hoods)