MEDIA IN COMICS 016

Production on these Media in Comics showcases must sadly slow down now, for I have worked my way through my backlog. As evidence of this, today we are showcasing some magical books, which are genrally unique items that fall under nobody's definition of mass media but which I want to include anyway, for fun's sake.

Books of Magic:

You all remember the fabled Black Book of Sorcery that the wicked Egyptologist Ford committed all those murders for, well here it is! Until Mr Justice wipes its pages with a convenient self-destruct spell contained within it, that is.

Origin: Ancient Egyptian 

Status: Destroyed (Jackpot Comics 003, 1941)

The Lost Book of Thoth, containing all the magics of sunken Atlantis, is supposed to rest on the bottom of the Nile under the watchful eye of an immortal serpent. The plans of mice and men and whoever is in charge of everlasting snakes often go astray, alas, and the book is stolen by an unnamed mage and nearly used to destroy the world. Having solved that particular problem, Dr Fate doesn't take any chances and reduces the book to a powder.

Origin: Ancient Atlantis

Status: Destroyed (More Fun Comics 058, 1941)

The Secrets of the Priests of Zoraster (sic) might not be the official title of the book used by Haldane the Sorcerer, but it's a pretty good title for a made-up book of magic and we have no other options. This one gets left behind in a secret passage rather than being destroyed, so it's technically up for grabs.

Origin: Persian? 

Status: Extant (More Fun Comics 063, 1941)

Though Sin Khaii is an apostate Tibetan Buddhist, the Book of the Dead that he is referencing here is more likely to be the Egyptian on than the Tibetan, as he is using it to research the Black Pharaoh. He also casts spells out of it later!

Origin: Ancient Egyptian 

Status: Extant (Silver Streak Comics 014, 1941) 

Theatre:

Detective Larry Steele is called to the set of Jealousy to look into threats against star Laverne James, and then stays to solve the murder of Laverne James. More interesting than the murder mystery, however, is the mystery of just what is going on in this production.

 

We don't actually see any of the on-stage action, but the costuming is extremely intriguing: James' co-stars John Temple and Jan Gabrielle are dressed like off-model commedia dell'arte characters, while she looks more like a character from a Southern Gothic. Finally we have Peggy, who is part of the chorus line and is dressed like she is in a high-budget napkin advertisement. It's a baffling selection. (Detective Comics v1 047, 1941) 

Swastika Over Europe is a play designed to rally American support for the beleaguered nations of the Continent and as such is a target for sabotage by Nazi fifth columnists, as seen here when lead actor Opperman is murdered on-stage. (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 023, 1941)

Here we have The Creep, a play written expressly to warn the people of NYC about the threat of Crime & Corruption, Inc. I guess it works, because Johnny Thunder slapsticks them out of existence. (Flash Comics 013, 1941)

Ordinarily getting such a good view of the stage would be very exciting to me as it would be a chance to divine some information about the production. Alas, this is an opera called The Masked Ball and so the only thing we can learn is that someone at the titular ball has come dressed as a police officer. (More Fun Comics 067, 1941)

The Superstition Murders is of course the play written by Johnny Glim the alter ego of the villainous Masked Man, who commits a series of superstition-themed murders in the hopes of tanking the production and thus securing the movie rights for his work. Though the motivation for the fictional killer is unrevealed, this seems to essentially be what the play is about as well. (Batman Comics v1 008, 1941)

Though there are many fine plays about the lives of the wealthy, there is no way The Vandgilts, about a real-life family who are on good enough terms with the production to lend them half a million dollars worth of jewellery, isn't complete sycophantic mush. Luckily the Joker spices things up by robbing the actors mid-performance. (Batman Comics v1 008, 1941)

PROBLEMATIC ROUND-UP 009

It it the nature of comic books that we will always be doing Problematic Updates.

Dr Finkle:

Dr Finkle himself is nothing special: he's a psuedo-Nazi teamed up with the pseudo-Japanese Matsui in a scheme to steal securities belonging to Axis-conquered countries that are held in America. The real issue lies with Finkle's primary agents, who you may notice being referred to as "Indian Monsters" in the final panel above.

These "Indian Monsters" are straight out of something like Bone Tomahawk: inhumanly huge, fast and strong, barely verbal, ravenous cannibals that Finkle keeps under control with a steady diet of human flesh... literally monsters, in other words.

I was going to say that the only good thing about them is that they eventually eat Dr Finkle but no, I must be thinking about some other monster-men. Instead, a special agent named Betty shoots Finkle and they immediately transfer allegiance to her thanks to "ancient Indian folklore." It's enough to tire a guy out. (Four Favorites 002, 1940)

Loanga:

Loanga is your regular old 1940s voodoo witch doctor, though he deviates from the norm by not being from Haiti but from another Caribbean island named Naseba, a name that feels like it should be in reference to something but if it is I cannot figure it out. Loango aims to take over the world with his zombie hordes and is starting with the United States, having captured and zombified Secretary of State Brant and compelled him to push for the disarmament all US military installations.

As usual it is interesting to note the specifics of Loanga's zombies. They are created out of living people using a combination of drugs and mind control and though they are still alive and able to speak, they cannot be killed by conventional means. They are cured and go back to normal when Loanga dies - whether this means that the ones who were dealt lethal wounds just fully die is not explored. Finally, they cast no shadows, and there's something going on with their eyes - the ones who we see trying to pass as regular folk all wear dark glasses, but no reason for doing so is given.

Loanga is ultimately undone by his own belief in the power of sympathetic magic: when comic relief artist character J. Rembrandt Speedball paints his portrait and then destroys it in a fit of pique at the thought of being executed by firing squad, he drops dead. All the zombies are freed or dead and the world is saved! (Fantastic Comics 023, 1941)

the Big Boss:

The Big Boss, a mysterious masked Chinese man who controls the opium trade in the Western city of Middletown (highly inaccurate name btw) unsurprisingly turns out to be J Harold Stetson, the prominent banker who has been making a lot of noise about how much he hates all this opium smuggling (and please note the misspelling that initially has his middle name as the weirdly amusing "Harlod"). (Lightning Comics v2 002, 1941)

the Death Patrol:

Here's the tragic thing about the Death Patrol: it's mostly something that I really like. I'll lay out the setup and you see if you can spot when we get into Problematic territory.

The Death Patrol is formed when wealthy pilot/failure Del van Dyne's plane is hijacked by a quartet of escaped convicts (and the pal who helped them break out). Del manages to weaponize his sense of rich guy ennui/ desire to make a difference in the world to convince the five to join him in volunteering to help the RAF defend the UK from Axis aggression, and thankfully all five are expert pilots in addition to their professional skills so this is a bit more plausible than it might otherwise be.

The hook of the early Death Patrol stories, and the source of their name, is the fact that they only take on the most dangerous missions and have an attrition rate of one member per adventure. (Military Comics 001, 1941)

The original lineup of the Death Patrol is as follows:

Del van Dyne: Wealthy failure and leader of the group. Alive at the end of 1941.

Butch O'Keefe: Safecracker. Sacrifices himself to stop a Nazi bomber group by crashing into them.

Gramps: Pickpocket. Alive at the end of 1941.

Hank: Rustler. Alive at the end of 1941.

Peewee: Forger. Shot in the back by Nazis in the very first Death Patrol adventure.

Slick Ward: Con artist. Dies in an exploding Nazi dirigible.

Additional members added in 1941 as the death toll rises: 

Stoney Rock: Arsonist. Shot by Nazis on his first mission. (Military Comics 002, 1941)

Zazzy: Kleptomaniac. Dies while rescuing workers from an exploding Nazi factory. (Military Comics 003, 1941)

Chief Chuck-a-lug: Former Wild West show performer stranded in Europe due to the conflict, and yes, congratulations, you spotted it. This is where the Death Patrol officially becomes Hard to Recommend, because from this point forward there will always be one or more racist comic relief characters running around and, for instance, yelling about scalping people. Alive at the end of 1941. (Military Comics 004, 1941)

King Hotentot: The ruler of a small African country that has been occupied by the Axis, King Hotenetot is a prime example of the Educated Savage, a classic unfunny comedy trope in which a character speaks eloquently due to a classical education but still, for example, runs around with a spear threatening to eat people like he's just flown in from a hateful jungle adventure. Still alive at the end of 1941. (Military Comics 005, 1941)

Jumping back to some of the fun things about the Death Patrol, here are their fun prison-themed flightsuits and skull-in-a-hat insignia which is personalized with a custom hat for each pilot. Fun! 

The Death Patrol also flies around in eccentric homemade airplanes, which is whimsical! It's the sort of thing that makes you want to recommend the comic to a friend, until you remember all the Problems.

ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 057

Can you tell that I've hit the "M" portion of my aliens spreadsheet

Martians:

These very humanoid Martians have a whole series of problems: 

1. some heavenly object is due to smash into their planet 

2. they are bad at science

3. when they turned to Earth to look for help with their problem the only person they could get to help them was this jerk named Ritton, who intends to cash in his Mars favour for help in taking over Earth 

4 Ritton doesn't even have the Super TNT they need to save their civilization, he just knows where to steal it 

5. the Human Torch is involved and not happy about the way that Ritton and the Martians are handling things

All this adds up to a long series of misadventures in which the Martians kind of half-ass attempts to steal the Super TNT formula from its creator Carson and then (because they crashed a train on top of Carson and killed him, right out of the gate) his daughter Diane while the Human Torch flies around beating them up.

The Torch eventually captures Ritton and the Martians offer a mid-level apology for the hundreds of deaths that they have caused while working for him - they had to because the Great One said so! This is good enough for the Torch and Diane and they hand over the Super TNT. Mars is saved! (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 003, 1940)

Mercurians:

Rex Dexter of Mars has to operate outside of his sphere of expertise here, because these vile slavers are from Mercury. What's worse, they haven't just been capturing regular people to slave for them (we never actually learn just what kind of slavery the Mercurians are into) but have somehow also got ahold of Dexter's ladyfriend Cynde.

Though the Mercurian-on-the-street looks like an axe-wielding pig-man, the Mercurian leader Lord Curo and his elite guards all dress like they are in an owl-themed 1960s super-spy organization, possibly called W.H.O. This is very handy for Rex Dexter, who sneaks in after stealing a guard's outfit and then sneaks all of the slaves out in some more guard outfits acquired in a quick brawl. Once Curo has no more Earth hostages, his city is bombed to dust by the vengeful humans. (Mystery Men Comics 019, 1940)

Mercurians:

These Mercurians are very boring white guys, but even boring aliens get acknowledged here. They might just be Earth colonists, though, so view them with mild suspicion. (Planet Comics 007, 1940)

Mermen:

The Mermen are an undersea race who work for the non-Merman and big creep Poseida to strip the ruins of the underwater city of Coralla of its riches. It's possible that they are descended from the people who lived in Coralla before it was ruined, in which case this situation seems pretty galling, but if it bothers the Mermen, they aren't complaining. Like most nonhuman servant races in comics they seem to have a pretty bad union. 

It's possible that the Mermen are related to the Frogmen of Atlantis, a similarly under-unionized aquatic species. (Fantastic Comics 003, 1940)

MAD AND CRIMINAL SCIENTIST ROUND-UP 028

These guys use science for crime and evil, for which we excoriate them, but they also make entertaining villains, for which we celebrate them. 

Dr Stone:

Dr Elijah Stone has a calling and it is in creating and disseminating deadly plagues upon mankind. This, however, is the kind of passion that society frowns upon and Stone is locked away in the State Mental Hospital. Unfortunately for mankind, the State Mental Hospital seems to be one of those places that contracts its security out to the lowest bidder, because Stone escapes in no time flat.

Sure enough, there is soon a hot new Dr Stone plague ravaging humanity. This quiet New England Town is absolutely screwed, and the rest of the world is soon to follow if someone doesn't do something soon.

Enter time/space explorer Whiz Wilson, who pops into the future to a time when there simply must be a cure and is referred to the Medical Center on Mars. His quest hits a small speedbump when the Martian doctor turns out to actually be Dr Stone in disguise - it seems that when not making plagues Stone has dabbled in chronal physics and has independently developed Futurescope technology. He has been using the future as a home base to culture up enough plague germs to wipe out 1941 humanity in one fell swoop, after which he will enjoy some alone time on an unpopulated planet. 

Whiz Wilson smashes Stone's Futurescope and makes off with his personal supply of anti-plague serum but is forced to let the man himself escape. Both Stone and the text boxes set up Dr Stone as an upcoming recurring nemesis for Whiz to deal with, presumably in different time periods, but his evil plans are foiled by the fact that this is the final Whiz Wilson story. (Lightning Comics v2 004, 1941)

Professor Hanley:

Professor Hanley is one of the many comic book scientists whose development of a means of making artificial diamonds is seen as dangerous and/or criminal by a super-hero. Hanley is at least attempting to pass artificial diamonds off as natural ones so I guess this counts as selling counterfeit good, but I still think that this is not worth your time, the Angel. (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 014, 1940)

Howland:

Howland, the second and final foe faced by Sky Wizard, has been causing mass chaos by sending out his army of humanoid robots to loot and kill. He also has a real "evil Vulcan" look that I appreciate.

In addition to the extremely nifty robots (called the Robot Terrors by one and all, though I suspect that Howland just adopted the very cool name after he heard Sky Wizard use it), Howland is notable for creating these deathtraps that kill their victims by dropping slats out from under their feet at a rate of one per five seconds and then leaving them to dangle and strangle thanks to the tight neck shackle. This is pretty gruesome, but it's also very quick, and Howland still manages to be out of the room when Sky Wizard and his aide Keeshan manage to escape. 

Let's be clear: I was already worked up about this before I noticed that he says how many slats there are because even at, say, one hundred slats that's only eight and a half minutes, but no, it's six slats. That's thirty seconds, Howland. You're too busy to wait thirty seconds for a super-hero to die? I don't even feel sorry for you that you eventually die at the cold metal hands of your own robots, because I only feel contempt. (Miracle Comics 004, 1941)

Captain Kiddlaw:

Captain Kiddlaw, the Wizard-Pirate, is a scientific scoundrel who vexes the Super Police of the far-flung year 2023. His scheme involves dragging passing cruise ships to the bottom of the ocean for loot and slaves and is never technically foiled due to the cancellation of the "Super Police 2023" serial. They probably get him eventually, though. (New Fun Comics 002, 1935)